Seven Things...

Apparently blogging two or three times a year just isn’t enough for some people because Shannon tagged me with this “meme” thing to force me! (What the heck does “meme” mean?) I guess I’ve put it off long enough but I don’t know what seven things I’ll be able to come up with. You’ve been warned…

1. I was the reason my parents got married. Apparently I was on the way long before they considered getting married and I was conceived in the back seat of someone’s car. This is not something I ever needed to know about myself (or my parents!) I still need therapy over this one! :)

2. I really wasn’t sure I wanted to get married and if I did it wouldn’t be until I was at least 25 but preferably later. And I certainly didn’t want children! I figured I’d just mess them up. I was going to have a career and a nice black and white apartment in the city somewhere high up.

Reality: I got married at twenty (I guess I just couldn’t resist that trick he does where he pretends to take his finger off! Sigh, he’s so dreamy!) I have four kids and I homeschool them. I live in a rural town (example: my neighbor and I buried her dog in her front yard last week. You just don’t do that type of thing in the city! Yes, he was dead.) I’m some sort of hillbilly Martha Stewart or something and I still don’t know how it happened! (My oldest says I’ve been “countrified!” )

3. When I was a kid I could turn my eyelids inside out. It was gross but the boys thought I was really cool. I won’t do it now because it hurts.

4. My mom was a truck driver and I used to travel with her around the Midwest (she was long haul). I went to more bars when I was a child than I have been to as an adult. Traveling from city to city and sleeping in that little sleeper compartment was really pretty fun. I felt so adventurous (and yes, cool!) skipping school for a few weeks at a time to travel the country. Truck stops still have a special place in my heart because it’s there that I first learned of the miracle that is the Shirley Temple drink! I’m getting’ a hankerin’ for greezy food and soda! (Maybe that’s why my dreams of city life were doomed! It was those truck stops!)

5. This one is for Shannon. I once had a big cut on the back of my heel. I took a needle and thread and sewed it shut. Myself, Rambo style. With no medication! I didn’t get an infection and I don’t have a scar there. I didn’t even know how to sew! I don’t recommend it.

Two more?! I’m not that interesting!

6. I was a brazen shoplifter as a kid. You know those electronic things at the front of the store? They probably invented those because of me. I once went into a store, got a paper grocery bag and filled it with stuff (unpaid for) then just walked out. I had posters sticking up out of the top of the bag and no one stopped me. I also once stuffed umbrellas up the sleeves of my ski jacket and walked out of the store. That is the extent of my life of crime. I’m not on the FBI’s most wanted list or anything so you will get no reward for turning me in.

7. I wanted to be a Solid Gold Dancer. Do you remember that show? I loved those sparkly, flashy costumes! I would practice with my sister and our cousin in front of the TV trying to do those moves. I also loved watching American Bandstand! We’d dance to that show too.

Phew! I made it to seven! Anything I’ve said should not be used against me! (Or I will make all of you join me in a Solid Gold style dance expo at the chili cookoff!)